Thursday, August 30, 2007

Wedding Update (for anyone who still cares)

It feels like I've been talking about wedding stuff forever. I realize it's only been around three months - and that I certainly could have done a better job of this whole bridezilla thing so far - but still. A few people have asked recently about how wedding stuff is going, so I thought I'd summarize a few recent developments here and you can read at your own risk :)

Got the call last night that my dress is in! I'm so excited. And trying to figure out when I'll have time to go and have my first fitting... My life is SO incredibly busy and fabulous right now.

Everything's finally done for our guest book. Geez. Who knew that such a simple idea could be so incredibly complicated to pull off?! Good thing I put Geoff in charge of the hard stuff.

I had my first shower last night, complements of Laurie and Val and the rest of my mom's family. It was very sweet, fun, and Geoff and I will enjoy our new dishes, serving pieces, storage containers, and (shhh...) gift certs for La Senza. A huge thank you from Geoff and I to all of you! We love you all :)

Premarital counselling is going swimmingly. I think we only have one or two appointments left and, so far, the minister isn't begging us not to do this. I consider that success.

Sold my piano last weekend, and it got picked up today. Kind of a bittersweet moment. It doesn't really fit in the new house, and I'll miss it - but it went to Steve & Val, and Anica is starting piano lessons next week. Any kid who's as creative and mathematical as she is MUST have access to a piano during their formative years, in my humble opinion. And so I can rest easy, knowing that it went to a good home. At the same time, we moved out my bed - also going to a new home. So I'm back on my old trusty twin for this month. AWESOME. These are all very sure signs that the wedding - and the big move into our house - is coming up quickly. As a matter of fact, NINE DAYS til I need to be down to my bare essentials here at the Alice in Wonderland House, to make room for Ally. Craziness. (Remind me again why I can't just move in with The Boy now?)

Flights for our honeymoon are BOOKED. We're flying from Winnipeg to Athens (via Toronto and Zurich) on Oct 31 / Nov 01, from Athens to London on Nov 09, and from London to Winnipeg (via Montreal) on Nov 13. Very excited would be an understatement. We're also working to finalize details on a Greek Islands cruise from Nov 05 to Nov 09 that includes Mykonos, Kusadasi/Ephesus (Turkey), Patmos, Rhodes, Crete, and Santorini. Insane. We're actually kind of giddy about it.

And the best wedding news of all... We *officially* have one month to go!

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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Wanting It All

What should a modern woman need to have in her life in order to feel fulfilled? Are we truly meant to have it all? Or is that an illusion that only works on sitcoms and feminist dramas? Is it realistic that the simple things that kept our great-grandmothers happy (taking care of a husband, a family, a home) should keep us happy also? Or were our great-grandmothers actually happy doing what they did???

I experience my first career moment today where I feel like I was being forced to give something up for the sake of a wedding, a honeymoon, and a healthy relationship. It was freakin' hard.

It was hard because I want it ALL. I'm a selfish human being. I want to continue pursuing this career that stresses me out and keeps me running 24/7 - and makes me really happy. I also want a happy marriage to Geoff that works, and (eventually...) a little family too. And I honestly feel that it should be possible.

I want to feel like I don't *have* to choose. And I sure as heck don't want other people choosing for me. I feel like - as a modern professional woman - I should get to choose whatever combination of career, relationship, and family that Geoff and I decide works best for us.

But am I dreaming? Does the world actually work that way? And is it okay that I feel like I need to have my career in that mix in order to be fulfilled?

I feel guilty for even asking these questions, because my life is charmed and I know it. I look around at my life, and I'm not really sure how I ended up here, but I am 26 years old and - in this moment - I have everything. I honestly feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

And it's surprising me to say that this week, because it's actually not a great week to be Lindsay at all. It's a week where the pain in my legs and my back is kind of crowding out everything else and making it hard to focus on my work and other things that are going on.

The funny thing about my illness, though... I'm actually okay with the pain this week. It helps me know that the rest of it is real. If you're all happiness and no hurt, how do you know that you're happy?

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Letters from Peru

From my friend Jen:
On Wednesday August 15, 2007, an earthquake measuring in at a magnitude of 7.9 struck just off the coast of Peru, followed by several aftershocks with magnitudes ranging from the lowest of 4.5 and the highest of 6.3. According to Peruvian government officials, 450 deaths and at least 2,000 injured people have been reported throughout the country.

These letters were written by my aunt, Hilda Simard. Living just outside of Lima, she is a Catholic missionary who has dedicated her life to helping the poor people of Peru. I felt that these letters had to be shared as they are beautifully written and describe the state of affairs following the earthquake in a way that the meager news reports of this event could never possibly describe. I hope you find these letters as moving as I do.

You can read Jen's aunt's letters at

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Monday, August 27, 2007

Monday Smile (sorry, Cait...)

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Back to School

So today is a pretty big day in my family. It was *someone's* first day of school and - if my calculations are correct - she's probably sitting in her first class right about now. Yep, it's true: my mom started college today. Over the past two months, she was very busy setting the wheels in motion that lead to her (a) quitting her job, (b) applying for school, and (c) being accepted full-time into the Human Resources Management program at Red River.

I am so incredibly proud of this woman who is my mom. It takes serious guts to look at yourself in the mirror when you're 39 years old (hehe) and say, "I'm not happy with my career, I think I can do more." And it takes even more guts to decide to do something about it.

If I demonstrate any strength of character or determination at all, it's because of this woman who raised me and taught me everything I know about being a girl. She was an amazing Educational Assistant for a long time, and graduated from college for the first time when I was in Grade 11. And she's going to be excellent in her new career, we have no doubt - the business world needs more people like her.

I tried to encourage her to make my dad take a 'first day of school' picture of her with her backpack at the front door :)


Weekend Update: SexyBack Edition

We're going for a triple entendre on this one... Are you ready? Hang on, here we go.

1. Okay, so I'm not one of those girls who is all crazy about members of boy bands - or former members of boy bands. But I do have a slight but very real affinity toward Justin Timberlake. HIs music is so much fun. He's ridiculously talented. And it's a total joy to go to a concert when you can tell the person on stage genuinely LOVES what they do. Em and I spent Saturday night with JT and we were not disappointed. It was a great show. I'm always slightly more subdued, but Emily screamed like she was 14 years old again - and we snuck in some shopping and dinner to make it a super-fun girls adventure.

2. On our shopping adventure, I managed to find superfox jeans. In 10 minutes flat. Which deserves a medal or SOMETHING. I literally walked into Gap, wandered around for a while, spotted The Jeans lying on a table, grabbed one size, and announced to Emily that these would be The Ones. She, of course, laughed at me. But I threw them on, zipped them up, turned around (come on, you KNOW it's critical that the butt fits perfectly), and... mmmmagic. Absolute perfection. I love when that happens (and it seriously never happens).

3. And my boy is home. He came back from camp on Saturday in the middle of all the JT hoopla, and all is right with the world again. Not like my world stopped turning while he was gone for a week - everything's just better when he's here. (And I'm pretty sure that - given the fact that I am marrying him in less than five weeks - I'm allowed to semi-publically insinuate that I think he's sexy? Right?).

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Thursday, August 23, 2007

Thoughts at the End of a Day

Today was ridiculously long. The day after a photo shoot always is. And we were photo-shoot-ing ALL day yesterday. Got some absolutely amazing shots at three locations, and the campaign is going to be wicked. But HOLY COW. It's so much more work than it looks like.

I should stop watching Extreme Home Makeover, or whatever it's called. I bawl at a level that's completely embarrassing.

I miss Geoff, and I'm incredibly happy that he emailed me from camp yesterday. It's amazing how quickly you can get used to having someone there - when you survived and were perfectly fine without them for 25 years of your life. In any case, I'd do almost anything for one of his super-amazing hugs right now.

Did I mention how busy this week has been? I haven't stopped working yet, other than an hour-long chat with my mom. I think I'll go to bed very, very soon.

I had a great evening with Emily on Tuesday (sleepover! yay!) and with Jessica last night. It's so nice to just chill with the girls. That's something that I haven't managed to outgrow, and I don't really plan on outgrowing it ever.

I'm hurting today, and that makes me sad. My hips feel like I'm 96 years old. Frustrated sigh.

The kitchen is unpacked at the new house. It's amazing how good that feels. This house is slowly but surely turning into a home, and I couldn't be happier about it. I get the most incredible feeling of zen from just walking through the door, because it's OURS.

It's amazing what a quick walk-in mani/pedi can do for a girl's outlook on life, the universe, and everything.

This summer flew by incredibly quickly, and it's been cold all week. Sad. I'm wishing for one more weekend at the lake... Just one. I want to sleep in and play tennis and sit around the fire and turn off my cell phone... Happy sigh.

The green paint in the kitchen still makes me smile.

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Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Surprised By Love, and other chronic thoughts

National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week is coming up soon... The annoying, flashing bar on the right side of this page will take you to, a site that has lots of information and resources on living with an invisible chronic illness - and some great advocacy ideas. I'll be talking about this more as the week approaches - as you can imagine, it's incredibly important to me.

And as always, I encourage you to check out one of my lifelines: Jenni and the team give consistently great advice and work to encourage people like me around the world. They make me feel powerful, they make me feel hopeful, and they make me feel NORMAL. I am currently working on an article for them about my experiences of marathoning with arthritis and fibromyalgia, and I recently contributed a short reflection on the theme of 'surprised by love' - a collection of thoughts from chronic babes who've found incredible men who love them, broken old bodies and all. Stay tuned!

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Stop! In the name of the law!

So MPI - in their infinite wisdom - sent me a letter a couple of months ago, encouraging me to get an immobilizer installed in my car. Apparently, my car is on the list of vehicles at high risk for theft in Manitoba. Gee, thanks, MPI. (If y'all remember, my car was stolen last year, and recovered near the U of M the next night.)

I decided not to take them up on their offer. They pay for the immobilizer and the installation, but charge you extra if you want extra keys (which I do) or if you have a remote car started (which I do). It's like someone giving you a cell phone for Christmas - gee thanks, but now I have a monthly bill.

Anyway. I got a letter yesterday informing me that the immobilizer installation is no longer an option. In fact, I am not allowed to renew my insurance/registration until I can prove I have had one installed. Argh.

I know all the reasons why it's a good idea. I know that I'll get a reduction on my Autopac because I have one, and I know that they'll spread out the extra costs over my next five years of Autopac without interest. I also know that these suckers have something like a 2-3% fail rate - doesn't sound like a big deal, but it's going to be a HUGE deal if I'm stranded somewhere because my stupid immobilizer has locked down my own car.

The real issue is that I'm being FORCED to do this. I like options. I like making up my own mind about things. I HATE HATE HATE when people tell me what to do.

But none of that actually changes the situation. So it looks like - sometime between now and my honeymoon - I need to take care of getting an immobilizer installed into my car. Or, more accurately, Geoff is going to need to take care of getting an immobilizer installed into my car. (Marriage is awesome.)

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Monday, August 20, 2007

Weekend Update: Losing My Mind Edition

Okay, so I spend most of my life trying NOT to be That Girl. You know which girl I'm talking about. The one who absolutely requires the support and assistance of a boy, who cries to her girlfriends when he's busy for an evening, the one who obsesses about 'what he really meant by that.'

And I don't think I am that girl. But I had a truly girly moment this weekend that I feel a need to confess.

Geoff left for his week at camp yesterday. As a camp nurse, not a camper, you dorks. Emily and I drove him to CMU to meet the bus and immediately after unloading his luggage into the parking lot, he realized he'd forgotten the little first aid kit he likes to take with him. I volunteered to run to the drug store and pick him up a replacement while he checked all the kids getting on the bus for lice (seriously... EW). Em and I zipped around looking for a kit, and came up empty-handed. We got back to CMU and the bus was there, Geoff's luggage was there... but Geoff was not. I walked around for a few minutes looking for him, totally without luck. I settled for scribbling a quick note on the back of a receipt and tucking it into his bag.

But seriously. I know it's only a week (and a ridiculously busy week), and it really has nothing to do with him being gone - we've been apart from each other lots in the past year. But I HATE that I didn't get to say goodbye to him.

The rest of the weekend was good. Didn't do much on Friday - watched TV and cuddled with The Boy. Ran errands, sent out invitations, ordered Geoff's ring, decided on favours (and sampled LOTS of chocolate!), and watched a movie on Saturday. Went to church and had brunch at Cora's with Emily on Sunday, then spent the evening with my parents.

And now, somehow, it's AUGUST 20th. Which means that it's less than 6 weeks until the wedding. And a ridiculous 96 days til kickoff at Grey Cup (more on that soon). And 55 days til my biggest client launches their new brand. And 71 days until we leave for Greece. And 2 days until a major photo shoot that I'm still trying to cast.

And about ten seconds until I lose my mind...

To demonstrate the full effects of my insanity, I'm actually attempting to pack, move, and unpack my kitchen on my own tonight. I'll let you know how that goes :)

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Friday, August 17, 2007

Special Delivery

I had a lovely surprise today. Yes, I actually called a surprise 'lovely' - turns out that small and/or semi-planned surprises are actually kind of fantastic. Who knew? :)

I was sitting in a client meeting this morning when I heard the front door of our office chime. There was Kurt, my favourite printer, with his arms full. After the meeting, I rushed out to see what he'd left behind and - just as I'd suspected - there they were: wedding invitations, programs, dinner menus, and notecards. Lovely. They look beautiful, and I'm so excited to show Geoff after work tonight - and to start mailing them out to friends and family.

With that comes just a tiny little bit of apprehension... We made a decision that we wanted to have the smallest wedding we could, and I'm so worried about hurting people's feelings. I know that - at the end of the day - it's our wedding and we can do it however we want to. But you know. I just don't want anything to take away from the day's happiness.

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Thursday, August 16, 2007

The Invasion

Last night, we had the whole gang (Steve & Val, Anica, Sophie, and Mady) over to see the house. The most action that house has seen EVER, I'm willing to bet. Those girls individually have a lot of energy, and collectively... WOW. I love it. It was so much fun to feel that much life and energy in the house, and we had lots of fun walking over to Dorothy's for ice cream.

(Work Update: Crazy as usual. I can't believe how much I've accomplished this week, but it's seriously one of those weeks where my list grows exponentially with every single item I cross off of it. What else is new, right? Well, our new Project Manager started on Monday and she's great. It won't take long to feel like I can hand off a lot of what's on my mind and in my inbox.)

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Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Music and Lyrics

Had lots of fun with Mel last night trying to pick songs for the wedding. Seriously, if you ever need a laugh, try Googling something along the lines of 'classic love songs.' Ugh. The day that Britney and Jessica are actually considered CLASSIC anywhere other than on the internet is the day I pay someone to hit me over the head with a bat.

Oh, and the tree in our new backyard? Crab apples. I'm so thrilled :)

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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

You Know You Have a Problem When're watching the news on Monday morning and hear that Karl Rove has resigned. And your first thought is that you'll be a little sleep deprived that night because you know it's going to be an awesome Daily Show :)

I was not disappointed. You know I love a Mary Poppins reference. But - as always - it was my Jon (and his writing staff - LOL) who delivered.

"Oprah has to give away cars to get this kind of response."

And bringing on a brain/memory expert to explain was classic.

"Which area of the brain controls memory? And is that close to the area of the brain that occurs lying?"

Happy sigh. I heart Jon Stewart.

Of course, my sleep deprivation was also due in part to my extended 'hey let's meet up for a bit after work' with Anja and Chuck. They spent 50% of our time together making fun of me, of course - though Chuck's bachelor dreams and Anja's TWO weddings this summer also made pretty good fodder. Always so much fun to spend time with old friends.

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Monday, August 13, 2007

Colour Theory

What do you think makes certain people gravitate toward certain colours? It's incredibly interesting to me. I've had a bunch of people talk to me lately about the oranges and yellows they've added into their homes. I always think it looks great - but I've never been tempted to use any of those colours myself. And it's not a fear-of-colour thing. I just always seem to choose cool colours.

I choose to believe it's because I'm cool :)

All I know is that I really hated the red in the bedroom. I don't know what it was - it just stressed me out to see it. And while I watched (ahem... SUPERVISED) Rocky painting over it with the light blue paint, I could literally feel myself becoming calm and happy.

In any case, here is what I discovered about the red that I found so offensive:

RED. Physical
Positive: Physical courage, strength, warmth, energy, basic survival, 'fight or flight', stimulation, masculinity, excitement.
Negative: Defiance, aggression, visual impact, strain.

Being the longest wavelength, red is a powerful colour. Although not technically the most visible, it has the property of appearing to be nearer than it is and therefore it grabs our attention first. Hence its effectiveness in traffic lights the world over. Its effect is physical; it stimulates us and raises the pulse rate, giving the impression that time is passing faster than it is. It relates to the masculine principle and can activate the "fight or flight" instinct. Red is strong, and very basic. Pure red is the simplest colour, with no subtlety. It is stimulating and lively, very friendly. At the same time, it can be perceived as demanding and aggressive.

And the inoffensive new colours:

BLUE. Intellectual.
Positive: Intelligence, communication, trust, efficiency, serenity, duty, logic, coolness, reflection, calm.
Negative: Coldness, aloofness, lack of emotion, unfriendliness.

Blue is the colour of the mind and is essentially soothing; it affects us mentally, rather than the physical reaction we have to red. Strong blues will stimulate clear thought and lighter, soft blues will calm the mind and aid concentration. Consequently it is serene and mentally calming. It is the colour of clear communication. Blue objects do not appear to be as close to us as red ones. Time and again in research, blue is the world's favourite colour. However, it can be perceived as cold, unemotional and unfriendly.

GREEN. Balance
Positive: Harmony, balance, refreshment, universal love, rest, restoration, reassurance, environmental awareness, equilibrium, peace.
Negative: Boredom, stagnation, blandness, enervation.

Green strikes the eye in such a way as to require no adjustment whatever and is, therefore, restful. Being in the centre of the spectrum, it is the colour of balance - a more important concept than many people realise. When the world about us contains plenty of green, this indicates the presence of water, and little danger of famine, so we are reassured by green, on a primitive level. Negatively, it can indicate stagnation and, incorrectly used, will be perceived as being too bland.

Positive: Psychological neutrality.
Negative: Lack of confidence, dampness, depression, hibernation, lack of energy.

Pure grey is the only colour that has no direct psychological properties. It is, however, quite suppressive. A virtual absence of colour is depressing and when the world turns grey we are instinctively conditioned to draw in and prepare for hibernation. Unless the precise tone is right, grey has a dampening effect on other colours used with it. Heavy use of grey usually indicates a lack of confidence and fear of exposure.

More info on Colour Psychology at

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Sunday, August 12, 2007

Weekend Update: Colour & Culture Edition

Totally one of those weekends that was more exhausting than being at work. Where to begin?...

On Thursday after work, I stopped at the bridal shop and chose my veil. They seemed to find it slightly strange that I came on my own, but were super helpful and friendly as usual. I wasn't sold on the whole traditional veil idea, but the one I found is really simple and beautiful. I worry about hurting people's feelings by doing some of this stuff on my own, but it's sometimes easier for me - a way to ensure I'm making decisions for me and not based on what I think other people like or want.

After the veil pit stop (now there's an interesting phrase), I picked up Geoff and we went to go pick paint for the house, then had a dinner experience I'm choosing to ignore for that. It should suffice to say that it was one of those absolutely horrific customer service stories that should become a cautionary tale.

On Friday after work, Rocky met me at the house and we spent Friday evening and ALL day on Saturday up to our elbows in paint. Well, I had paint all the way up to my elbows. Rocky was pretty much spotless, professional that he is. Annoying - LOL. Anyway. At the end of Saturday, the office/library was a gorgeous dark grey (previously white), the bedroom was a perfect light icy blue (previously a kind of annoying and slightly slutty red), and the kitchen was EXACTLY the bold leafy green I'd been picturing in my head (previously white). I love all three. It's really starting to feel like a home here - and I'm excited to make it all official next month.

In between, I managed a migraine of epic proportions - my first, and hopefully my last. I experienced the full nausea, the vision loss, everything. It made for an interesting, zombie-like day of painting on Saturday. More than once, I was so incredibly grateful for Rocky's help. He pretty much just bossed me around, giving me the really easy jobs, and it turned out great!

After Painting Day was over (and Geoff had come home from work and helped with the kitchen), we had a movie date to see 'The Bourne Ultimatum' (FUN, and pretty much all I could manage without literally collapsing). Sunday morning, I was singing so we went to church in Niverville. Sunday afternoon, we ran a few errands and I worked from home a little bit. And then this evening, we met up with Rocky and Emily to check out a little bit of Folklorama.

We went to the Japanese pavilion first, where we sampled teryaki chicken and rice, sushi, green tea and mango martinis, and cream puff ice cream while we took in performances by Japanese fan dancers and a great drumming group.

The second pavilion we visited was the Alpine pavilion, and it was great. Very interactive, and the people there were CRAZY! It was so much fun to watch them having so much fun. And the apple strudel and Swiss chocolate were yummy :)

And that's that - the end of another weekend. Whew.

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Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Branding and the Five Senses

A study released on Monday has found that kids prefer the taste of anything wrapped in a McDonald's wrapper. ANYTHING. They even bothered to test McDonald's-wrapped carrots and milk. Apparently, the power of branding is more powerful than the power of taste.

Contentious topic, that's for sure. It's being argued that marketers are targeting kids before they are able to make good choices. It's also being argued that parents who don't want their kids to end up fat and addicted to McD's should simply not take them to McD's as often. It's important to note that, in Canada, there are definite laws designed to restrict marketing to young children (a law that is much more relaxed in the US, where this story is creating a lot of buzz).

Still, it's all very interesting - especially because kids are unlikely to be the only ones susceptible. I'm sure that most of us would find ourselves subconsciously preferring the fit and style of a shirt or a pair of shoes with the *right* brand name on them. Science is beginning to pinpoint the exact areas and functions of our brains that make us prefer the brands we do - Pepsi vs Coke, for example.

Advertising and strategic brand positioning is no longer as simple as putting a product picture on an ad and listing off the five reasons why you should buy this product over that product. It's becoming incredibly emotional, and infinitely strategic. It's why I love my job :)


Monday, August 06, 2007

Weekend Update: Family Camping Trip Edition

So the latter half of last week flew by in a blur of working, working without a functional laptop, and working whilst conducting millions of interviews in hopes of finding a new (a) project manager, and (b) receptionist for Cocoon. Oh, and I was sick. And when that takes second... third... actually, looks like FOURTH place in my world, you know it was a crazy week. Going into the Long Weekend, I knew that my clients were either happy or gone to the lake (or both), that my laptop's hard drive is getting copied over to a new machine that will be ready for pickup on Wednesday morning, that we have officially hired a project manager, and that we are very close to finding a receptionist. I was still sick, but whatever.

On Friday night, I hung out with Rocky and Emily (and Geoff, later on). Ice cream was enjoyed, chinese food was consumed, a little bit of our neighbourhood was explored, Rocky was introduced to 'What Not To Wear' reruns, and a good time was had by all. Except maybe Rocky. He wasn't quite as impressed with Clinton's neverending supply of argyle sweaters as Em and I are.

Saturday, Geoff and I ran errands for most of the afternoon, and then checked out the Folklorama kickoff at The Forks in the evening. And then Sunday and Monday were spent at the lake with my family. My WHOLE family. Which doesn't happen very often. It was great to just relax and laugh and enjoy ourselves. And that's exactly what we did, as demonstrated in these pics I stole from Jessica.

Cait looks as unsure about Pugsly as I feel on a good day.

Me and Mom enjoy an afternoon game of minigolf with the rest of the clan. My dad won, of course. And then rubbed it in, of course.

Kevin, Pusgly, Geoff. I was rather uncermoniously replaced as the love of Geoff's life this weekend.

Geoff, looking relaxed and maybe not quite awake yet.

Aaron, ALMOST smiling in the out-of-doors.

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Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Saying Goodbye

Yesterday was an incredibly sad day. Two friends who are very important to me lost their mom last week, and yesterday we all had a chance to say goodbye.

It was a beautiful service at the church, and then the burial and reception. I spent all day choking back those tears that just leave your chest in a giant knot and your stomach turning. We were asked to sing seven songs at the funeral service, and even the practices were hard. Making it through those songs with the family in our sight - without falling apart completely - was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. But I know it was just a shadow of the pain they were feeling, and that really kept it in perspective. It was an honour to do it, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat if she asked. It's a small gift to one of the strongest and most loyal, generous people I've ever met. I work every day to be just a little bit more like Kathy. The stories about her mom were incredible, and it's so obvious where her daughter's strength, her grace, and her spunk come from.

Please keep this family in your prayers. They're going to need them today - and in the coming days, weeks, months, years.

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