Dancing With Myself
So today got off to kind of a rough start. Apparently, my brain is taking an *extra* long weekend because I completely forgot that I'd promised to meet a client first thing this morning. Not the biggest deal ever - we easily rescheduled - but it's still embarrassing, and a brutal start to a Tuesday that feels suspiciously like a Monday.
My cure is the Glee soundtrack. Nothing makes a person happier faster than a Glee cover of 'Bust a Move' - and that's a scientific fact. There's a little bit of secret desk dancing going on here right now... And I'm seriously missing my old work buddies Christine + Dolly, because I know that if they were here and I pulled out my headphones, they'd be dancing along with me. This is not really that kind of office... :)
Labels: Back to Work, Christine, Cocoon, Dolly, Music, My Friends, The Cocoonettes
Welcome to Business
Today was exciting and scary and stressful and stress-relieving and about everything else in between.
For starters, I sent in my official, in-writing notice that I'm not coming back to work when my mat leave ends later this month. Well, actually, for starters we took Kevin out to lunch for his birthday and then I went and got a cleaning and check-up with a new dentist. But then I sent in my official mat leave letter (email). I didn't cry. I thought I would, but it makes a huge difference that I'm still working with them in my new, less-traditional capacity :)
And then I headed over to a 'Welcome to Business' workshop at the Women's Enterprise Centre. I won't lie... It's incredibly scary to start a business. Even scarier, I think, when you are doing it knowing that its success will bring stability and opportunity into the life of one very adorable ten month old baby girl (note that failure is NOT an option).
I feel like I'm getting a better idea of what I need to do to make it legitimate and grow it from there. It's going to be a heck of a lot of work. But I'm ready. I have to be, because I think I have a grand total of TWO mat leave cheques left. Um, YIKES.
Labels: Cocoon, Going Rogue
Going Rogue
AHHHH...
That is my sound of relief that I no longer need to keep this secret from my blog (and my work-connected friends).
During my bloggy silence, I've been busy thinking, planning, praying, researching, and finally meeting with my people at Cocoon. The short version of the story is that I've now let them know that I am not intending to return as their full-time Communications Director when my mat leave ends in October. Instead, I'll be starting my own business and doing my best to dig up some work as a freelance writer and communications / public relations consultant.
In a crazy little turn of events, I've signed up Cocoon as my first client. And I started today. Yes, seriously. My assistant there - who was supposed to be covering my mat leave - quit last week, so there really wasn't a lot of time to think about it. I met with Cocoon on Thursday for a preliminary chat, so to say that this happened quickly is the understatement of the century. That's how we roll in the advertising industry, hehe :)
In the meantime, I'm thinking about business names, downloading government forms, researching Canada Revenue small business rules, waiting on hold with EI to figure out the impact on my mat leave, learning about business accounting, ordering a Mac, and just generally learning as much as I can about starting a business.
It's a little bit crazy. It's incredibly scary, because I really have to trust that we'll be able to make this sustainable - at least until Briony is two (which is my short-term goal). And it's very, very exciting for me and my little family, because I'm going to be able to do 95%+ of this work from home (or from wherever my laptop gets a wireless internet connection).
AHHHH!!!
(That one was excited :)
PS - Now poor Geoff can't use
this image that he'd been saving for me to use on my blog. HAR HAR.
Labels: Briony, Cocoon, Going Rogue
Out Of The Loop
After all my joking about being old, I'm *really* feeling it today (and not just because I'm in the middle of a fibro flare). I'm trying to decide whether or not to show up at a launch party for a client campaign being hosted by the agency I work(ed) for.
As a sidenote, I never know how to phrase my employment-related thoughts... I know that mat leave in Canada is considered continuous employment wherever you worked until you pushed a baby out (or got too fat to fit behind a computer anymore), but I haven't actually gone to work there in... holy cow!... almost eight months and counting. It's incredibly strange.
Anyway. Back to the issue at hand. I'm finding that I'm at a point in my mat leave where I've been removed from the world for so long that the idea of 'going out' kind of intimidates me. Why? I have no idea. These are my friends and coworkers, and a mere nine months ago, I would not have hesitated to switch into some cute heels, add an extra coat of mascara, and plant myself squarely in the middle of the party.
But now... It's just different. I feel old, and out of the loop, and kind of apologetic - if that makes any sense at all.
I really want to do my hair and go and have fun and see people, but I also really want to stay in my jeans and comfy orange shirt and bare feet and bake cookies. We shall see which Lindsay wins tonight.
PS - As a related sidenote, if you're on Facebook and love Coldplay, become a fan of Grant's Degree of Separation before the end of this weekend. They'll be giving away two pairs of floor seats on Monday.
Labels: Cocoon, Mommy Stuff
Gold Star for Lindsay
I just got my third individual assignment back for the course I'm taking... And it's the highest mark yet! The instructor had nothing but great things to say about my paper. Just one left before the end of the course, but I'm feeling *much* more confident than when I started.
It's important to note that I am literally giving myself a gold star for this one. My mom gave me two sheets of shiny little gold star stickers the last time I saw her. I love my mom.
It's also important to note that the whole 'gold star' thing totally made me think of Christine and Dolly... Back when the three of us worked together, we were feeling very unappreciated at work - and so Christine bought a huge pile of stickers, and we would present them to each other whenever we saw someone doing great work or needing some encouragement. No one gives me stickers at home... But now I have gold stars! And you can bet that I'll be using them, hehe :)
Amazing how humans thrive on that kind of affirmation. I've noticed that I do that for Briony. When she rolls over or tries something new, I'll clap and cheer for her, and her little face just lights up the entire room. She's *so* proud of herself. At four months old. No wonder we all have just a tiny little bit of a complex by the time we're adults.
Labels: Back to School, Briony, Christine, Cocoon, Dolly, Family, The Cocoonettes
Cocoon Open House
B and I made a quick stop at the Cocoon open house back on March 21. Kyle's mom sent these over the other day... A peek at Cocoon's new office space - complete with baby toys (unintentionally, of course).
Labels: Briony, Cocoon, Photos
A Tale of Two Mugs
At Cocoon, I was a little bit known for my coffee consumption. I think that part of it was just liking to have something in my hands at all times, to feel more comfortable - so I wandered around the office about 99% of the time holding a cup of coffee. And often a pen. (Incidentally, you'll notice that I was holding a Starbucks cup for our engagement photos. And that I look really awkward in any wedding photos where I wasn't holding my flowers. And when I was student teaching, it was a joke with my classes that they needed to come and pick up their pen from the little collection that ended up on my desk by the end of each class, after circulating to help the students with their work - and accidentally stealing their pens.)
Anyway. Back to Cocoon. The only trouble with this mug-clutching situation (other than the inevitable caffeine buzz, and the hardcore withdrawal I experienced when I had to switch to decaf while I was pregnant) was that I talk with my hands, and would put down said cup of coffee whenever I needed to explain something to someone. You could find me two minutes later, searching the office for my accidentally discarded mug. Which wouldn't have been a big deal, except that Kyle was equally bad at leaving his mug on people's desks, in meeting rooms, etc. And then we didn't always know which lonely mug was which. (Of course, Cocoon is a branding agency. So all the mugs in the office were identical and colour-coordinated with our office, our logo, etc.)
Geoff very cleverly decided to buy me a 'work mug' as a gift. It is lovely - curvy and white and full of George Clooney (he illustrated it for charity). And so this mug spent lots and lots of time in my hands at Cocoon for probably a year and a half before I went on mat leave. It was a sad day when I packed it up to bring it home with me - along with my bobbleheads, my photos, Flat Eric, the snitch, my tiara, and all the other stuff from my desk.
But here's the thing. I can't bring myself to use my At Work Mug at home. I tried it once, and it made me tear up. It just makes me miss work. There are so many emotions attached to it. And so, every morning, I pour myself a cup of coffee on our kitchen counter and it goes into my At Home Mug - the Starbucks mug we brought home from Seattle last year. I keep on thinking that I'll use the George Clooney mug tomorrow... But I never do. It's such a strange thing.
I know. I need therapy. Or at least more interesting things to blog about. Unfortunately, I was forced to (reluctantly) cancel our playdate with Nicole and Palmer because of the icky weather today.
How about you? Any strange quirks or rituals you feel like confessing on this dismal March morning with the sleet coming down outside?
PS - I still *heart* the obnoxious green in my kitchen. Best paint colour EVER. I can't believe that - almost two years later - it still makes me smile every single time.
Labels: Cocoon, Nothing Important
Four Month Appointment
So I brought my big beautiful baby girl to the doctor's today for her four month checkup. And we confirmed that she's big... At four months, she's sitting at 16 lb 10 oz and 25.5 in - that's the 95th percentile for weight and the 90th for height (and her head is still off-the-charts big, hehe). She handled the immunizations like a trooper.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love this girl? She's so funny and goofy, and so easygoing - after her appointment, we walked over to HSC and met Geoff for lunch and then dropped in at the Cocoon fifth anniversary open house. At HSC, she was mobbed by Geoff's coworkers. And then at Cocoon, she was surrounded by my coworkers, clients, suppliers, and other assorted party guests - and she just sat back and smiled at them all.
She's friendly and fun, and once you add in those squishy cheeks... Yeah. I think we'll keep her :)
Labels: Briony, Cocoon, The Boy
Tea Party
Briony and I had our first tea party today - and invited all the Cocoon girls to join us. We had a *lovely* afternoon, and my baby girl charmed all our guests with her cuddliness and big gummy smiles :)
I'm not sure, but this *may* be the only picture of Dolly holding a baby. EVER. But she's been bonding with Briony since she was a fetus (hehe).
Briony was full of giggles and smiles for 'Auntie' Amber, who was more than willing to play with her.
I'm still kind of a little bit in shock that Christine held a baby - more than once! Briony's pretty hard to resist :)
This baby is all tea-partied out...
(Briony, not me - although I look pretty tired too :)
Labels: Amber, Briony, Christine, Cocoon, Dolly, Photos, The Cocoonettes
Busy Girls
It was a cold, cold weekend in Winnipeg - and not just because Geoff was working nights. Neither of those crappy things stopped me from making plans and staying busy.
On Saturday, I *officially* left Briony for the first time to attend the Cocoon Christmas party (my parents graciously volunteered for babysitting duty). It was kind of hard to be away from my baby girl, but I'm really glad that I went. I had lots of fun catching up with some of my work friends and dinner was yummy. After dinner, we all went back to Kyle & Jill's to continue the festivities - but I was home by 10.30 to relieve my parents. Ah, the realities of motherhood continue to sink in :)
Briony and I bundled up on Sunday morning and roadtripped it out to Niverville for church - her first time at Word of Life, where she was swarmed with admirers who love her to pieces. It felt oddly comfortable to be there with her. After church, we headed to my parents' place for lunch and the afternoon. Our visit ended up being extended when I didn't feel like driving home in the evening - it was too cold, and I was too tired (and I'd packed for overnight in case the roads got bad). So Briony and I had a sleepover and ended up staying to see Jessica and Chloe this morning.
Briony and Chloe together were hilarious... Every time that Chloe would cry, Briony would start to cry too - but a strange cry that I've never heard before, kind of an imitation of the noises that Chloe was making. Super funny. Jessica and Chloe are coming to visit us on Thursday, so we'll see if it was a one-time show or something to get used to.
It felt relaxing for me to be 'at home' for a little while, and it was great to get to talk to some adults this weekend. Yes, I'm counting my dad as an adult... hehe. I love just hanging out with my baby, but with Geoff working so much, I'd really been feeling the need to TALK - and baby talk doesn't count :)
Briony and I made it home safely in the cold today, and then we spent a quiet afternoon at home with Geoff. By around 4 pm today, I was starting to really feel the fibromyalgia flare-up that I've been expecting. Instead of the constant discomfort that's become the norm over the last couple of days, it's escalated to constant pain. In some ways, I still feel brave because I get smarter every time I do this and have a better arsenal of tools to help fight this. In other ways, this is the scariest it has ever been for me because of Briony.
Tears were shed this afternoon, but I know it will be okay somehow. God is bigger than this. And it's such a small battle when viewed in perspective. Still... Please keep our little family in your thoughts and prayers. It would be awesome if this flare-up was a very temporary little thing.
Labels: Arthritis/Fibromyalgia, Briony, Cocoon, Family, The Boy
Firsts
Today was a milestone: Briony's first trip to the doctor. We met her pediatrician, Dr Hanna, and I was happy with her - something that doesn't always happen with a new doctor. We were referred by our obstetrician, and I'm almost wondering if the two of them might have gone to school together because they both seem very close in age.
The appointment went well. Briony is absolutely okay after our car accident on Saturday (we were rear-ended, for those of you not on Facebook, and everyone seems to be doing okay other than a touch of whiplash and a headache that I've been dealing with since then). She's gained almost 9 ounces over her birth weight, which puts her at the 75th percentile for weight and around the 90th percentile for height. Interestingly, she's at the 95th percentile in terms of her head size - which kind of explains a lot about my recovery :)
After our appointment, we stopped in to introduce Briony to some of Geoff's coworkers. She made her first appearance at Cocoon yesterday. My coworkers were much more apprehensive than Geoff's, but equally happy to meet her.
And now, after replacing our two week old car seat / stroller / travel system (at Autopac's insistence), we're back at home and the rest of my family is napping on the couch while I'm trying to get bottles washed, baby laundry stains soaked, dinner defrosted (hey, I'm not magic), living room decluttered, presents wrapped, and Christmas tree finished. Oh, and blog updated.
I don't think there's any better feeling in the world than watching Geoff and Briony together. I keep on stopping what I'm doing to just look at them and smile. My heart is so happy and full.
Labels: Briony, Christmas, Cocoon, Mommy Stuff, The Boy
Baby Update (and some Halloween Fun)
Another week, another appointment with our obstetrician. Well, it *should* have been - except that she's on vacation this week (after specifically telling me a few weeks ago that she had no vacation plans before my due date... but I digress).
This morning, we met another doctor in the same practice group, and he was great. We got another perfect baby report, and learned that her head is engaged and *very* low (which explains a lot about how I've been feeling). No dilation yet to speak of (just a measly centimetre), but 90% effaced - so at least we know that something's going on in there. He wanted to sweep my membranes, but we decided not to... Tough decision, because I'm having a lot of hip discomfort and I'd love to meet this baby girl of ours - but it's still a few days til our due date. It was emotional because I'm putting so much pressure on myself to pop this baby out before my mom gets sick again (radiation is set to begin on November 12). But there are no guarantees, and Geoff is scheduled to work ALL weekend. I've never heard a rave review of the little procedure itself, and I know it's usually only effective if the baby's pretty much ready to come anyway. And so, we'll give it another week and see what happens. It's feeling like the right decision so far, for what that's worth.
And so, we're back at home and Geoff's working on decorating some spooky Halloween cupcakes to bring to work tonight. I decorated a dozen this morning and dropped them off at Cocoon. Check out the spookalicious pictures below. I think the werewolves look just a little too friendly :)
My first attempt to create a werewolf cupcake, as per Geoff's request
The gang's all here!
Some of Geoff's creations
(his werewolves are *much* spookier than mine)
Geoff's evil Halloween cat
(I am *clearly* not the artistic talent in this family, hehe)
Labels: Baby Talk, Cocoon, Holiday Awesomeness
Good News
My mom was supposed to be having chemo tomorrow. Our whole family was kind of messed up about it - we were encouraging her to do it, of course, but every treatment has been taking just a little more of her. It's been hard to watch. But it's been harder to realize that this chemo was going to put her out of commission right when the babies are coming. I think that hurt her even more than it hurt us.
My parents saw the oncologist yesterday morning, and learned that he decided to cancel her sixth and final treatment, and move on to radiation as soon as she's strong enough (and as soon as they can get her in). They're confident that they've killed all the cancer cells with the first five treatments. Which means that she's done chemo! It's a milestone we've been anticipating for so many months, it's kind of hard to believe that it's here.
It means so many things for us... It means that she's not going to lose her hair that's starting to grow back in. It means that she's going to be healthy enough to help with the babies. It means that there's still a tiny hope she might be done radiation before Christmas. As strange and theologically unsound as this may be to say, it feels like evidence that God hasn't forgotten about our family, and that he didn't screw up when he chose these babies' due dates. It's GOOD NEWS.
I hosted my mom, my sister, my aunts and my cousin, and my grandma for lunch yesterday. It ended up being a little celebration, because of my mom's news. My dad came in for a while when he dropped off my mom, and I missed seeing my parents smile like that - not just a laughing-at-a-joke smile, but the kind that's shining with hope and joy.
Later, Geoff and I met up with a few friends from the Athens Joints in Motion team and had dinner at Pizzeria Gusto (still one of my very favourite dinner spots). It was fun just to catch up with them - we heard all about Brad & Laura's wedding plans, and met Tara's boyfriend, and planned our next mini-reunion.
Now, I'm off to Cocoon for lunch (just can't stay away - hehe), then I have a pedicure and a bikini wax booked for this afternoon (too much information?). Geoff and I are heading over to Reynold & Tammy's for coffee tonight for our one-year marriage check-in (Reynold is the pastor who married us). I'm thinking that if I'm knocked up, things are probably going okay... But it will be fun to hang out with them - they're expecting Baby #2 later in November.
Labels: Cocoon, Family, Joints in Motion, The C Word
Kyle & Jill's Wedding
Not sure how it's possible that I'm *behind* on blogging when I'm technically unemployed, but that's what has happened. In any case... Saturday marked a rather auspicious occasion in the world of Cocoon: our beloved boss Kyle made things official with his girlfriend Jill, and the entire gang was on hand to celebrate.
It was a fun night, and kind of a cool way to say goodbye for now.
The wedding was at the Millennium Centre, which felt ever-so-slightly like a return to the scene of the crime - just one year and two weeks after Geoff and I had our wedding there. I still think it's a beautiful place for a wedding.
The happy couple, Kyle and Jill
Me and Christine
Me with Christine, Dolly, and Tara
Naturally, as with most Cocoon gatherings, things devolved into a Cocoon Dance Party...
...but this time - ready or not - the Dancing Machine was there to make his grand Cocoon Dance Party debut.
The Dancing Machine slows down long enough to dance with his highly pregnant wife (and poses for an obnoxious 'how awkward can we make this look?' photo).
A quick spin around the dance floor with Harold...
...while Dolly keeps my sheepish-looking husband entertained.
The crew stops for a short photo break - or at least half of us. I'd like to point out two things: first, how many chins we all have from this horrible photo angle, and secondly, how you can still see my face beyond my pregnant stomach. Go Lindsay!
Somehow, despite the whole nine-months-pregnant thing, I managed to dance for 3+ hours (granted, I was barefoot for most of it). But I didn't go into labour. Clearly, this baby's staying in there for a while... In the meantime, I hope she enjoyed her first Cocoon Dance Party experience - it might be the last one for a little while :)
PS - An extra-special shout out to all my girls who dug through their maternity wardrobes and managed to come up with at least ten dresses for me to pick from! Kari-Ann's won out, but it was awesome to have so many options.
Labels: Cocoon, My Friends, The Boy
Saying Goodbye (for now)
Today is an incredibly sad day for me, because I'm genuinely going to miss coming to Cocoon every day. I love my job. What makes it easier is knowing that it's not goodbye - it's just goodbye for now. It also helps that I'm meeting Christine and Dolly for breakfast before we all start work today - a friendlier start to an emotional day.
I've been working in advertising since I was 19 years old, the last three of those years at Cocoon. It's become such a huge part of who I am that it scares me a little bit. I realized this week that I don't remember the last time I haven't worked. I'm that girl who still logs a few hours from home on a sick day - unless I'm recovering from major surgery (and even then, I've tried my best to keep up with what's going on in the office). And a vacation day means that I've literally left the country, or at least the province.
I don't know how to have a day off. And that is evidenced by my schedule for next week, already full of appointments, moms groups to check out, and other assorted activities in an effort to make my electronic calendar look less EMPTY. Maybe I'll be able to pick one day and delete all the pretty coloured boxes off of it - those boxes that tell me I'm important, and I need to be somewhere. Baby steps.
I need to remember that an empty calendar does not equal an empty life. In fact, the truth is probably quite the opposite. I know that my life is about to become richer and fuller than it's ever been. I just need to stop being intimidated by all the blank white spaces.
My career will still be here in twelve months. But for right now... I have a baby on the way. (I'm pretty sure that's what I'm supposed say.)
Labels: Baby Talk, Cocoon, Music
Tell Every Woman
We're right in the middle of launching what will be my final Cocoon project until I return from mat leave, and I'm pretty excited about it.
What is it, you ask? We're spreading the word about
Manitoba Pap Test Week.
I'll let that sink in for a moment. Now I'll tell you why I'm so excited about it, and why it's so important.
- Around 50 Manitoba women are diagnosed with cervical cancer each year
- In 2008, 15 Manitoba women will die from the disease
- Regular Pap Tests can prevent up to 80% of cervical cancer
- Only 49% of eligible women in Manitoba have had a recent Pap Test
- Most women who get cervical cancer have not had a Pap Test, or have not had one in over 5 years
- 1 in 14 women will have an abnormal Pap Test result (this does NOT mean that you have cervical cancer, but it DOES mean that you should keep your follow-up appointments)
October 20 to 24 is Manitoba Pap Test Week. Any woman can have a Pap Test without an appointment by visiting a participating clinic. All women who have ever been sexually active (or who are over 18) should have regular Pap Tests as a way to help prevent cervical cancer.
To find a participating clinic in your community,
click here or call 204.788.8626 (toll free 1.866.616.8805). You can also call this same number to find out the results of your past Pap Tests.
If you haven't had a Pap Test in the past two years and you have a doctor who you trust, call today and make an appointment. If you don't like your doctor or don't have one, check out one of the Pap Week clinics and get it over with.
And that's all I have to say about that. I don't want to hear your excuses, girls. We all hate going. But it's important - and YOU are responsible for your own health.
Now tell all your friends. I know it's not as 'okay' to talk about cervical cancer as it is to talk about breast cancer... But we can change that :)
Labels: Cocoon, Current Events
Three Days and Counting
Yeah, you heard that right. I'm counting. Who knew.
When I first started to contemplate a 'work completion' date, I had no idea how to decide. You want to pick a date that's early enough so you can enjoy a little bit of time before the baby comes and your life gets flipped upside-down. You also want to pick a date so you can avoid sitting around and twiddling your thumbs for six weeks. I hoped and prayed to strike a balance between hysterics about being super-sad to leave my job (that I love) and feeling like I had stayed at work too long and missed out on some critical home time.
My final decision was not really that strategic. Thanksgiving seemed like a natural break - everyone else will leave on a long weekend, and I'll leave for twelve months. And that was pretty much that. How the heck was I supposed to know how to pick a mat leave date?! I've never done this before.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I think I've nailed it. I'm going to shed tears on Friday, to be sure, but I feel deep in my heart of hearts that I'm done (for now). I have three days now to tie up as many loose ends as I can, pack up my desk, say a few temporary goodbyes, and begin the next part of this wild and incredible journey that is my life.
Crap. I'm crying while I'm writing this. This does NOT bode well for Friday.
Labels: Baby Talk, Cocoon
Cutting Poster
A poster campaign that I worked on is being featured on several design and advertising blogs. This is one in a series of three, shot on a shoestring budget for a non-profit client - case in point, this picture was taken in my bathroom and, yes, that is the lovely and talented Kirsten who volunteered to try her hand at modelling for a day last summer (and did a fantastic job!).
Thought you might be interested in taking a peek, while I still have work (read: non-baby) stuff to post occasionally :)
HINT: You can click to make it larger.
Labels: Advertising, Cocoon
Surprise Baby Shower
So apparently the way to fool Lindsay into a surprise party is really quite simple: ask her to plan it.
On Saturday morning, I met up with the Cocoonettes for what I thought was a 'Welcome Back Asta Brunch' - planned by yours truly in honour of our former assistant who moved back to Lithuania for the summer, but recently made her (temporary) return back to Winnipeg. For the uninitiated, the Cocoonettes are all the girls who are presently or have recently worked at Cocoon, plus the Cocoon boys' significant others. We get together for Girls Nights at least every couple of months - more often, if we can manage it.
I seriously did not catch on that anything had been going on behind my back before people started showing up at Cora's with pink baby gift bags. It was a surprise baby shower. For me. Silly girl. And I'd even volunteered to get up and head to the restaurant extra-early to ensure we'd have a table.
Kudos and thank you to the Cocoonettes. Briony is seriously going to be the best-dressed baby girl in town, destined for a career in... well, advertising, naturally.
Labels: Baby Talk, Cocoon, My Friends
The End of an Era
I just sent the email that makes the beginning of my Mat Leave official. My last day of work will be Friday, October 10.
I know that I want this baby. And I know that I want to spend this next year at home with her. So why can't I stop crying? (Please don't just tell me it's the hormones.)
Labels: Baby Talk, Cocoon
