runlindsayrun

A Lot Going On

It was a busy weekend. We started off by having Rocky over on Friday night to start on the rather substantial task of magically transforming the dark and gloomy mancave into a bright and cheerful baby room. I say 'magically' because I really can't take credit for any of the work.

Geoff and I spent a few hours with Anja in Assiniboine Park on Saturday, capturing some autumn-inspired maternity photos. Later in the afternoon, Rocky came back and worked on the baby room while Geoff tackled another coat on the exterior house trim. I occupied myself by making the boys dinner and keeping them company (read: probably annoying them by sitting right in the way and yapping while they were trying to be productive).

The baby room's looking great - and the paint job will be finished by tomorrow night. I'm so excited. Pictures to follow (baby room AND maternity).

Saturday ended with a phone call from my dad, confirming what I'd been kind of expecting all day. My parents were home from spending the day at the ER - for the third time in ten days. My mom's having a rough time with this round of chemo, and still having complications with her port. I don't know why I knew... I just felt it all day. So while it wasn't a surprise, it was definitely one of those times when I hated being right.

I'm not really sure what to say about today. I'm just not myself right now. I woke up feeling extra-emotional, and I'm pretty sure that's how I'll go to sleep tonight as well. First, it was off to Niverville to help lead worship one last time. It was hard to know that I was saying goodbye to the team (at least for a little while) but, honestly, it was harder to be up on stage and not have my mom in her regular spot. She's occupied that place over the last decade, singing along and cheering us on. It just felt strange to have her missing now at the end.

A few songs in, I noticed that my dad had snuck into the very back of the balcony. It meant so much that he came.

After church, I went to go spend some time with my parents. It went about how I had imagined it would. It's hard to see my mom this sick, and both of them so tired. I'm not really sure what else to say. I was emotional to begin with, and that time at home was just enough to break my heart. I think I cried all the way back to the city. It's just starting to feel like it's been a long time since we've heard some good news about my mom. And we all need it. It hurts so deeply for me to see my family like this. And I hate that there is absolutely nothing I can do to fix it, or even to help. I know that good days are coming again... I really believe that. But today was not one of them.

Geoff and I took his brother Kevin out for dinner this evening to (quietly) acknowledge his 32nd birthday. I felt bad that I was in such an introverted mood tonight, but fortunately Kevin's quiet enough that I *still* probably seemed chatty :)

I'm not really looking forward to tackling a Monday tomorrow morning. The idea's a little bit overwhelming. It's kind of relief to know that it's my second-last Monday morning for a while...

Labels: Anja, Baby Talk, Can You Handle The Truth?, Family, Rocky, The Boy, The C Word

posted by Lindsay @ 10:36 PM