Change, Change Go Away
I like planning, and I like lists. I actually own paper that is pre-printed with lines and boxes to make lists and check things off as I complete them. Needless to say, I am *not* a big fan of change.I'm trying to change (har har) my attitude, because it seems that - not only is change something that's inevitable - it seems to be the theme of my life recently. I'm fully aware that *some* change is good. Just look at my beautiful little family. But even good change is change, and change is just another dreaded c-word in my books. Too much of any kind of change just kind of gets to you after a while.
I wish that I could blog about what I'm thinking about, stressing about, and feeling right now. But now is not the time, and this is not the place.
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How to Cope with Stress - Daily Stress Busters
* Be gentle with yourself. Cultivate a pleasant environment. Surround yourself with what you like whenever possible, whether it is flowers or colors or pictures. Make a space for yourself where you can relax, alone or with others.
* Remind yourself you are an enabler, not a magician. You cannot change anyone else's behavior. You can only change your own behavior and responses.
* Take a mini-vacation from stress. If you can find fifteen minutes a day, or one hour a week if daily isn't possible, make a date with yourself. Schedule a walk around the block, lunch in the park, a sunrise or sunset alone, a bubble bath without interruptions, a stroll through a favorite store, a cup of your favorite beverage away from the demands of the day. Take a deep breath and concentrate on a slow exhalation while tension melts from your limbs.
* Have a massage. (Exchange massages with your spouse.)
* Give support to another and learn to accept it. Everyone feels helpless (and perhaps hopeless) at some time. Admit it and get on with it. When someone needs you, be there for him/her. When you need someone, tell him/her. Use a buddy support system. Find someone you can call or talk to any time.
* Change your routine when it might help refresh your life. Get up a few minutes earlier and go for a walk? Take a different route home from work? Wear your rings on different fingers? Order something different from a menu? Have dessert before your meal?
* Learn to recognize the difference between complaining that reinforces stress and constructive criticism that helps.
* Focus on one good thing that happened each day. Keep a gratitude journal where you list what you are thankful for daily.
* Be a resource to yourself. Try something new, learn to play again. Laugh. Laughter releases endorphins, chemicals in the brain that restore calm.
* Avoid shop talk outside of work. If you socialize with co-workers, keep it social, not a rehash of the day's tensions.
* Say "I choose," instead of "I should." "I won't" instead of "I can't."
* Make exercise a part of your daily life-even if it's only taking the stairs instead of the elevator or parking at the far end of the lot.
* Make rest a part of the daily plan. There's no such thing as catching up with sleep on the weekend.
* Have a diet check-up. Eating too much fast food, deep fried, sugar-laden foods? What about your caffeine intake? Balance you diet, balance your life.
* Say "no" when asked to do something you really don't want to do.
* When you're concerned (worried) about something, write down your feelings about it or talk with someone about it. Worries shared are halved.
* Simplify your life. Eliminate the trivial.
* Take slow, deep breaths throughout the day. Sigh.
* Choose not to waste time on guilt, worry about the past. Remember, events exist in time, feelings do not. The event may be past, but feelings linger on. Let go of both.
* Enjoy nature, nurturing, music, children. Seek harmony in life.
* Do one thing at a time. Focus on it, do it more slowly, intentionally.
* Respect yourself. Talk positively about and to yourself.
* Learn to relax, using prayer, meditation, yoga.
* Accept yourself.
* Develop listening skills and negotiation skills.
* Be aware of the demands you place on yourself and others. Release those that are unrealistic.
* Prioritize activities. Do what's most important.
* Set goals for yourself.
* Delegate, delegate, delegate.
* Face fears. Find facts. Take action.
* Remember happy times. Stroll through photo albums.
* Keys to a happy life are: something to do, someone to love, something to look forward to.
* Do first things first.
* Reward yourself.
* Make your space friendly and comfortable. Give thought to lighting, temperature, noise.
* Wear comfortable clothing.
* Don't seek approval from others.
* Make peace and move on.
* Time your activities according to your biorhythms-if you are a morning person, schedule the hardest tasks in the morning.
* Choose to stay or leave, to work or not.
* Choose an appropriate level of emotional involvement. Choose your attitude.
* Have fun
When one door closes another door opens; but if we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the ones which open for us.
- Alexander Graham Bell
Labels: Stuff I'm Thinking About
posted by Lindsay @ 12:11 PM
6 Comments:
Aw girl I feel for ya. Coffee soon?
I looked through a photo album this morning - your baby album. Most of the time, we don't see the whole picture or what it will look like down the road. Most of the time, it takes trust and hope and grace to put one foot in front of the other. As long as we're willing to keep going! I don't know if that made sense. Oh well, Love you.
(The word verification was "papping". Does that mean a trip to the gyn.??)
Just working through that great list should keep you from stressing out too much about stuff:) I was surprised at how many of those things I actually do to create either positive change or de-stress. Your Mom is right...one foot in front of the other...
Urban Oasis... GO THERE!
Change is scary, but also INCREDIBLY liberating. Just ask the newly unemployed girl. Only two mat leave cheques left. SCARY. Not having to freak about sending my baby to daycare every day. LIBERATING.
But I hear you. I like control. In fact, I think that's the biggest reason why I couldn't go back to work. I can't control everything at work and everything with my baby. And when baby and work conflict, baby wins.
But it's scary as all get-out...
SERIOUSLY need some Linds/Anja/KA time SOON! I think my nights just got VERY free as Kris is away... Maybe I'll try to call tomorrow...
Is that all it takes? That's quite a long list for someone who's trying to de-stress! :) I guess for someone who loves lists...
I thought of you this Sunday. The sermon was on gifts on how we all are blessed with many gifts to make up the entire body. My pastor said, "If everyone had the gift of organizing, everything would be organized and done 'just so' but no would have any fun.'" Au contraire, I say if everyone had the gift of organizing and everything was done 'just so', we would all be having a neat, controlled, enjoyable time 'cuz there would be no unorganized people messing it up! - I thought of me and you.
But seriously, good on ya for be gentler with yourself. Put your mental list to bed for awhile if you can. The other day when Eva was in bed for a nap (she stayed in there a whole half hour!), I made myself a cup of vanilla hazelnut tea and just sat - no book, no tv, no computer, nothin. Just about drove me nuts. Oh, I made a short grocery list. But I told myself I didn't HAVE to make that list; I WANTED to. Sigh, we can all do better at cutting ourselves some slack.
Cheers!
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