The morning-after checklist
With six of these pesky little jaw surgeries behind me, I've gotten pretty good at coping. My mom and I pretty much have Surgery Day down to a fine art. Number Seven was no exception.The next morning is always the scariest time for me. Before I even open my eyes, I start running through my mental checklist. Still alive? Yep, kind of. Can I move my limbs? Check. Can I move those limbs far enough to reach my drugs on the nightstand? Good. Can I open my mouth far enough to jam those pills between my teeth? Nope. But I'm able to wedge a finger in between, quickly slip the pills inside, and swallow. Back to sleep.
Later, I actually climbed out of bed and sat down in front of my computer. I was reading through some of yesterday's email when the sun coming through the window behind me shifted to precisely the right angle to cast a shadow of my face onto the screen. Scary. Scary. Scary. Even in this vague reflection, I can see that my head doesn't look like the shape my head's supposed to be.
I'm more swollen than yesterday. And y'all saw the pics from yesterday. I'm not letting anyone see me in this state, so you'll have to let your imaginations do the work.
My mind races and I briefly contemplate suicide (who will ever want to be with a girl who's both mute and grotesque?! as long as I was just mute and attractive, I was fine - it had crossed my mind that I might have even stumbled on the magic combination... :)
Ah, this too shall pass. It's actually all getting kind of funny. (That might be the drugs.)
:)
L
posted by Lindsay @ 8:19 AM
2 Comments:
You look great kiddo! Just pretend you had your molars out. All you need is a toblerone for the little triangle in the cheek and you are good for a commercial shoot!
Hey! Get back to work, so I can make fun of you! hahaha j/k
Get better soon.
H
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