Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The One Where I Get Disorderly

I don't know how it's possible, but the end of these trips gets harder EVERY SINGLE TIME. But did I cry about it? Nope. Tears would have been mature. Instead, I was just kind of generally miserable and bitchy all day yesterday.

In my defense, I've also been sick - and I know that had something to do with my general state of mind. But yesterday I was just full-on upset that we were going home and ready to dig in my heels and start looking at houses here. Truth? No part of me is looking forward to coming home on Thursday. And that doesn't mean that I don't love the people in my life in Winnipeg... It just means that I love the people in my life here too.

It happens every time. And so I know that - a couple of days after we're back at home - I'll be absolutely okay again. But for today, IT SUCKS.

We capped off the day with a visit at Aaron + Cait's. Marilyn watched Briony while Geoff + I spent some time just hanging out in their apartment and drinking tea. Oh, and did I mention that we held the world's first and most awesome cupcake tasting? It got pretty pretentious. And SUGARY... I threw in the towel about two samples from the end. And then proceeded to power through the world's fastest band-aid-style goodbye before flying out their door and into the car with tears steaming down my face.

I'm feeling much calmer and more rational today. (Now that I'm thinking about it, it could just be a crash from last night's ridiculous sugar high.) I fully realize that - if we lived here - it would be equally hard to visit Winnipeg and then have to say goodbye to everyone we love there. Plus we'd be living in a near-constant state of financial struggle vs being comfortably middle class. But there would be no snow...

SIGH.

I'm happy in Winnipeg. I love our life. I just think that I'm wise enough to realize that we could be happy ANYWHERE. Well, happy anywhere but wherever we're visiting that requires a whole pile of goodbyes.

I keep on reading this for reverse inspiration :)

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